How Things Change

As many parents would agree, having kids changes you. I’m consistently astounded by the truth in that – as I have witnessed such an immense change in myself since Isaac was born just a little over a year ago.

I was comfortable in my job, happy in my marriage, and felt like I had a great thing going. I worked out one or two times a day, cooked dinner when I felt like it and we would go out on the days when I didn’t. Evenings were spent with each other, friends, family, the TV, or a last minute trip to Banff for dinner and some mountain air. Traveling also was something we did often as well.  Nothing held us back.

Life was chill, spontaneous, self- paced. You could have even called me us, selfish with our time. We did projects when we felt like it, went for walks when we felt like it, had late nights if we wanted to. Our time was mediated by us.

And then came the baby! The little person who changed it all. Even though I had insisted that my kid would be able to sleep anywhere, that I would still work out often, and that Babywise techniques would be our absolute way of ‘programming’ our child.  Lo and behold, nothing went as planned. Shocking, right?! All you parents are nodding while those of you without kids may just think we didn’t try hard enough.I was incredibly sick for the whole first trimester.  Like, really really barf-y, with no warning whatsoever.  Not planned or expected.  I delivered Isaac via emergency c-section. Not planned. I hemorrhaged. Not planned. My baby would fall asleep nursing and would sleep for good chunks of time. Not the way Babywisesaid it should happen – even though I really tried.I didn’t go back to the gym for nearly 3 months. Definitely not in the plan. Especially because a c-section wasn’t planned. I lost almost all of my baby weight right away, but my tummy sure hasn’t recovered. Sadly, not to plan. Gross stretch marks.  Never in the plan.  Isaac had a major sleep regression at 4 months. That wasn’t supposed to happen! He also refused to sleep anywhere but his stroller, car seat or bed. No playpens, couches, beds. Our social life didn’t know what to do with this glitch in our plans. The fact that he still hasn’t taken to solid foods and that he prefers to, at a year old, almost exclusively breast feed. Who would’ve guessed that that was in the plan ?
But what also wasn’t planned were the sweet, sleep smiles. The way our hearts would melt when he laughed. The warmth that came from holding that precious, sleeping baby as he nursed. The pride that swelled when he hit each milestone. The way our hearts hurt when he was sick or in pain from teething. The completely useless feeling when there was nothing we could do to make it better. The immense joy of flipping thru pictures that were basically all the same. Hundreds of pictures of our little baby. The unbelievable amount of time we’ve spent praying for Isaac. And our marriage has been incredibly strengthened since having Isaac.  All things I could never have anticipated.

I also never expected such an easy transition into parenthood.  From day 1 we hit the ground running.  Not that we had a choice !  But, with no manuals in sight, it truly is amazing how as soon as this wee human comes into the picture that you totally mostly know what to do.  The mothering-instinct is impressive really.  And thank goodness, because its trial by fire immediately.

That’s not to say that there weren’t days that I wished would pass that much faster.  That I didn’t get frustrated, upset, discouraged.  There were many occasions where I deliriously questioned whether I would make it thru the day based on how little sleep I had due to a teething baby.  8 teeth in one month is no joke !

But each day passes.  Too quickly.  And now I wish for a pause button to halt the alarmingly speedy train that is childhood.

I could care less about the gym. About what sleep training technique works best. The social life and the spontaneity. Those aren’t the things that are important.  The big things for me now are the smiles, hugs, moments.  The times spent running around the house, going for walks, playing with toys.  The teaching moments.  The times where my heart feels like it can’t get any more full.  I love this little man so much.  He’s changed me and my life when I thought it couldn’t get any better.


2 thoughts on “How Things Change

  1. I can attest to the fact that this little man has changed our whole lives too in the most delightful of ways! He is truly our sunshine on the cloudiest of days. What an amazing gift God has given in this little life! Grandma

  2. I totally agree with Crandma C. Little Issac is such a happy little fellow with joy written all over his face. You can’t help but smile and give him a squeeze. You and Lee are amazing parents and we look forward to watching your whole family grow. And now with this new house, that will transform from hhhhmmmm…. to wowzers.
    It will all be a journey, but one that will not be forgotten.
    Keep on lovin!!

    The blogs are fantastic by the way.
    Grandma M (from the city)

Leave Some Love

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s